1. Are you offended by this Web site?

2. Do you SUCK at Djing, playing music, making art or doing anything creative?

3. Do you only talk about YOU?

4. Do you carry a pinned flared shoulder strap messenger bag (with a seatbelt
clip) filled with scrap notebooks, coffee mugs and a broken pair of your
grandpa's retro sunglasses?

5. Do you have a Bishops haircut and pretend rednecks are your rivals when in fact your hair styles are quite similar  (i.e. mullet, mohawk, rattail)?

6. Do you often say "You don't know who (band with 5 fans) is?"?

7. Do you own indie records put out by SanFrancisco record labels such as Anticon, Bright Antenna Records, OM records and Thrillhouse records?

8. Do you own brand new Converse shoes, Sparkling white cowboy boots,
tight new blue jeans that makes your tiny junk look bigger, V neck shirts
that show off 2 chest hairs?

9. Do you talk shit about your friends band when they are on stage?

10. Do you have low self worth and maintain a facade of

11. Do have a bike with no gears that you ride 1/2 a mile because the
bike sucks?

12. Do have a Papst in your left hand right now?

13. Is the black die in your Mick Jagger haircut showing blonde roots?

14. Do you even know what a reverb pedal does or how to hold a paintbrush?

15. Do you have an array of unread dusty books neatly placed on your homemade
shelf and pretend to be intellectual about literature...well, because reading
is cooler than video games?

16. Do you spend more time on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook than masterbating?

17. Do you write for a hipster blog? (wait a minute)

17. Are you thinking right now you might actually be a PHILLY HIPSTER?

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